A unique offering of healing gifts and fine
Mama, Witch & Bitch
by Heike Boehnke-Sharp
When a girl baby is born, she is already born into a world of must be.
Womens roles start at this early stage. Girls are supposed to wear pretty
dresses and do girlie things. God forbid the little girl child is
not cute, since little girls are supposed to look like little dolls.
How many times do you hear I wish I had a little girl? I could dress her
up and do her hair, they are so fun! Little girls that play with boy things,
or are dirty, rough, and wear pants all the time, are considered tomboys
from toddler hood on, they are just not real little girls
Puberty comes, and we are confronted with the term virgin, but not
in the sense of generations past, when being a virgin was a status symbol of high
honor. Society has teenage girls believing it is a disgrace to be a virgin. Their
peers and their society pressure girls into sex early, thinking it is the thing
to do, and the one who actually does it is the one who ends up a teenage
mama. To the lucky girls, the virgin is the stage of beauty and growth.
Girls grow breasts, have their first menstruation, and slowly become women. In
many societies and cultures, this stage is still honored with beautiful celebrations
and rites of passage. We women need to give our girls the knowledge and self-esteem
that helps them develop. We have to teach them that THEY have the right to decide
over their bodies and their destiny, giving them choices. The virgin
is a stage of purity and beauty, not just a metaphoric term whether you have had
sex or not.
most women, the next stage is Mama. They get married and become a
wife, and the new mama to their husband, or they perform the miracle of birthing
a new human child. Some women CHOOSE to skip this stage all together, though I
believe we all have the Mama instilled in us, and play this role for
someone or something in our lives. No matter how well we try to prepare, we cannot
study up on this role, but grow into it. Intuition and experience turn us into
masters, nurturers with the goal of protecting our kingdom. We portray this role
with fierceness, and mamas are often compared to tigresses protecting their cub.
The variations Mamas are as diverse as women themselves: some women
stand by their man till death do them part, some women refer to their career or
business accomplishment as their baby, and others protect and live
for their children.
The Witch is not as the word in the dictionary,
but the spiritual side of a woman. Witches, before their discrimination and elimination,
were women of great intelligence and honor. Their rank in society was high and
powerful. They were healers, and women whose intuition and knowledge let them
perform great deeds. They were not always Beauties, but their aura of power and
self-confidence made them beautiful, no matter what the outer shell portrayed.
When todays woman reaches this stage, she is ready for change and self-fulfillment.
She is ready to find her inner self and true meaning in life. She turns to meditation,
psychics, aromatherapy, yoga, or other forms of natural healing to
comfort her inner spirit. In this stage, a woman stops dieting, dying, and otherwise
torturing herself to fit into societys beauty ideal, she turns her back
and starts to find her beauty inside. She becomes more confident, starts making
changes, and the Bitch comes out.
is in us from toddler stage, we just dont know it. When we discover her
in us for the first time, we suppress her due to etiquette. But boy,
when we need her, is she ever helpful!
She is our other
self that comes out when we fell threatened, cheated, or confronted. When
we are in a bad because something in our life is just not right, our first step
to changing it is to become bitchy. Some women get stuck on this step
for a very long time, but sooner or later they realize it and move forward. Others
jump right on up! In corporate America, strong and powerful women are often referred
to as bitches by their male counterparts or employees of both sexes,
because that attitude is what keeps them above ground and in charge. People are
intimidated, and of course annoyed, by bitchy women, but if you look at it as
a stage of wonderful stage you will see your sisters in a much rosier light!
at yourself, what stage are you in now? And the next time someone calls you a
Bitch, you can just smile and say Why, THANK YOU! The
circle is becoming complete.
Heike is the momma to two angels and two huge dogs, and lives
with her best friend & husband in CA. A German native, see she's her society
a little different, and comments on that in her articles. She is currently working
on a novel, is a work at home momma, and the owner of http://www.goddessinthegroove.com,
a website for women.